As a college student, my brain has two settings: on and off. In class my mind is (hopefully) razor-sharp: awake and gathering as much new information as possible. My poor brain is already chock full of knowledge, yet every day I seem to cram just a little more in there. For those of you who have learned anything, you know how exhausting learning can be. Sometimes I take naps in the morning instead of going to chapel – for which I am totally unashamed, by the way. Other times, I get back from Religion class and all I want to do is lock myself in my room with Pintrest and some chocolate. By this point it is difficult for my introverted self to be civil to even my closest friends.
After a while, I just want to turn my brain off. So I do. It is so much easier to live life half asleep. But is this true life? What am I missing out on while my mind puts up the “Do Not Disturb” sign?
My mind races. My heart throbs. My hands shake. I cry out to God, asking him why He’s brought me here. I have been stripped of all my strength, all of my smarts, all of my sanity, yet He asks me to stand courageously and carry out his work.
I am vulnerable. I am powerless. I am terrified. Continue Reading
Good-byes are sometimes harder than you think they’ll be. But a simple “Hello” is not as challenging as it appears.
On Wednesday, my parents, brother, and sister all saw me off to my next chapter in life: Calvin College. I didn’t cry – at first. But walking away from the only life I’d ever known… it was a lot tougher than I thought it’d be. I made it about six feet before turning around and running back into my Daddy’s arms again. The moment was priceless.
My mind raced. I kept thinking that “I don’t have to do this, I can go home.”
But I stayed. Continue Reading
Calvin College was never in the plan.
For seventeen years I anticipated and researched and considered all the things I could do after graduating from high school. Will I take a year off and try to figure things out before going to college? Will I go out-of-state? How about a public university in the Upper Peninsula? I can major in English and become an editor at a publishing company. That seems like a solid career for someone who excels in spelling and grammar.
Or maybe not. Continue Reading